Last night I realized that I need to implement a shopping ban, ASAP.
Sunday was one weird slippery slope. I was feeling kind of sad about not owning a home and was feeling impermanent and not like a “real” adult. So, in an effort to get reinvigorated about my current living situation, I went trolling the internet for inspiration. 2 hours on Pinterest led to 3 more spent on various art websites. With 5 hours under my belt, I had gone from aspirational browsing to spending $165 on things for my wall. One wall. And then I realized: My shopping habits in the last couple months are in direct conflict with this major goal in my life.
I’m a single person. I can spend what I want on whatever I want. I don’t have to answer to anyone or worry about joint finances, and believe me, that luxury is NOT lost on me. The freedom of renting is not lost on me, either. I could pack up and move across the country with a moment’s notice. But the thing is, I’m really more of a lay down roots kind of girl. I always have been.
I want to be reallyreallyreally ultra crystal clear because I think this post is sounding more severe than I want it to: this is not an addiction {dirty word, right?} but I am using shopping as a crutch. As a band-aid solution for some other circumstances in my life. Even though I’m shopping with purpose {decorating that wall has been on my to-do list for 2 YEARS, holy wow}, I think I’m mostly shopping because I’m trying to fill some kind of void. Because I need something to be excited about, because somehow it makes me feel less sad, less lonely. It makes me feel better.
So this month is for reality checks and shopping bans. Girlfriend needs to get some balance back.
And just so I don’t totally freak my parents out: financially I’m fine, guys! I’m just not as balanced as I should be. And tell you what else: my wall’s going to be mighty cute in the next couple of weeks, that’s for damn sure.
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